Sunday. Oh sundays. Tomorrow is Monday and that means back to work. In case you haven't heard, I thought I would fill you all in on my experience that I had about a week ago.....

8:00am- I'm working with 4 second graders on reading. I have another 2nd grader working on reading a book by herself, because she's been reading it all week and is about to be tested on it when I'm finished with my group.

8:30- My group is about finished, they are working on their independent work and i call her over and have her read a page, i read a page. I ask questions as we go along.

*Let me tell you here that this little girl is so sweet and spunky. She reminds me of my neices, sweet yet sassy. She loves attention, she loves hugs. She's in my room 3 out of 4 hours. She doesn't brush her hair. what 8 year old does right? to make it more obvious, i love her.

ok, so as our reading starts and about comes to an end, i think she's giggling on the table, because she's so spunky and silly, but in the matter of seconds (which felt like forever) she is not giggling on the table, she's collapsing. she quickly (but felt like slow motion) falls to the floor. unresponsive. i go into teacher/mother mode. i quickly get my radio, call the principal for help, run next door, get the other spec. ed teacher. my assistant is on the floor with her trying to get her to respond. i am down there rubbing her arm and holding her hand. assuring her that she's ok even though she's not responding. i can feel her muscles tensing up. she finally opens her eyes slightly. she's like a waking child, not sure whats going on, shes scared and wants to cry but can't. i start telling her she's ok and that noone is here, just her and i and my assistant. i start asking 21 questions. it may seem like an hour has gone by, but it's been a mere 5 minutes. The principal isn't sure who is calling for help because apparently I didn't state my name while calling for help., so i get a call on the PA in my room asking if it's me that needs help. seconds later i have a principal, assistant principal, nurse, and secretary in my room. Once the nurse takes over, i can feel myself about to cry. i asked if i can be excused for a second. actually i think i said "i need to use a break card" thats what my students use. they tell me to go take a walk down to the kindergarten rooms because no one is in there.

as i walk out of my room, my eyes well up with tears and as soon as i see the other spec ed teacher out there, i let it all out. as i'm being comforted, i start to tell her that i thought she was going to die. that was my first thought. how can i let this happen in my classroom? what could i have done better. i take a moment to walk to one end of the hallway and then back down to see whats happeing.

i meet them in the nurses office. shes sitting in a wheelchair. lathargic. trying to sip applejuice. tired. not looking at anyone. as her mom comes in and gets her, i wish her well and assure her she's going to be fine. but is she?

i get a call back from her doctor asking what happened and it seems as though shes had a seizure. we still haven't received all the test results. she hasn't actually received all the testing.

my first year has been one heck of a first year. it started off with small things and now we are at this experience. i don't want to know whats in store for me next. but i know that God isn't going to give me something that i can't handle. maybe this was a practice. i can only hope that my first year ends on a good note. i have about 2 months left. to be cont....